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Wednesday 5 March 2014

Olympicoholism 2: Hot, Cool..what?

Hot. Cool. Yours.

The three word motto of the Sochi Winter Olympics, proudly (and incomprehensibly) stamped on all official merchandise as if daring you to ask why the Russian Olympic committee felt it appropriate to remind the world of the types of porridge eaten by Goldilocks in the house of the three bears - perhaps the description of the beds ('Hard. Soft. Just right') was deemed inappropriate? 


It may well have been lost in translation. 

Anyway, the Sochi Olympics are over and the Sochi Paralympics are about to begin and hopefully this doesn't all prove to be merely a prelude to a major European war (as per the 1936 Garmisch-Partenkirchen and 1984 Sarajevo Olympiads). What I've learnt from these games (other than it's probably not a good idea to spend over 50 billion dollars on turning a summer holiday resort into a centre for winter sports), thanks to the power of snowboarding, is that I can match the arcane dealers of management speak in the very next board (bored) meeting that I attend. I hereby append a short report including some useful phrases that I've learnt which I shall include in my annual statement of achievement:

"In shreddin’ the Gnar, he sure bailed that rail. Nosegrab 360? Huh - backside 180 with a melon-grab! Tearin’ it up, I’m goin’ to bust a 3. Stomp that! Let's shred the fresh pow; that’s one crunchy kid."

I'll let you know how it goes.


9 comments:

  1. Rad dude, grot rad. Slither!

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  2. You mean this isn't the new slogan you'll be using to signify your office hours? I'm disappointed.

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    Replies
    1. The note on my office door says quite clearly: 'Eat. Sleep. Repeat.'

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  3. Hey, don't biff the bunny hill

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    Replies
    1. Even if I knew what that meant, I wouldn't dare !

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  4. Slice the melon man. Bust that! Drag ten

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    1. Thank you - I have accordingly sliced a melon, busted it then dragged it around for 10 minutes. I hope that this is sufficient.

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